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Greg Evans Describes a Film in “Diaz Drives”; Criticism Gently Weeps

In response to Greg Evans’s 508‑word review of The Counselor on Bloomberg News 

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2013-10-25/diaz-drives-counselor-red-capital-bastards-film.html

By Rochus Pomponius, Adjunct Critic

Greg Evans & Craig Seligman combine forces for a tag team effort in “Diaz Drives Counselor,” which is little more than the duo describing a film. One will contemplate the modern meaning of “review” and wonder if criticism is still a thing.

Diaz Drives opens with a vague statement, which may arguably have the most analysis of the review with the words “messy” and “overheated.” One is immediately notified of the Diaz sex scene, and the now much talked about windshield romp is quickly becoming the go-to topic for lazy The Counselor reviews.

All of the paragraphs in Diaz Drives are approximately the same size, which leads one to believe that the critics needed to write something up quick given the disappointing lack of content. Though their crisp phrasing can pack an occasional punch, there is an extreme absence of any originality in the review.

Readers will be stunned not only to discover that the Diaz Drives is just a description of a film, but that it concludes abruptly without any sort of personal statement or opinion. What’s the point? The duo clearly are not interested in any type of character analysis, let alone providing insight on the lead character. It’s all a bit ridiculous.

Diaz Drives will make one ponder the state of modern film criticism.    

Quality of Writing Quality of Argument Spoiler Avoidance Presentation

Rochus Pomponius joins the Existimatum staff after a celebrated career as a court jester and the personal entertainer of Emperor Trajan. His studies in rhetoric inform his assessments.