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Michael Arbeiter’s “Tied Together” Is an Emo-Review With No Character

In response to Michael Arbeiter’s 516‑word review of Ender’s Game on

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Michael Arbeiter attempts to connect with the audience in his latest work, “Review: Ender’s Game Has A Lot Of Fun But Barely Keeps Itself Tied Together,” but his tale has little warmth.

Arbeiter tosses out a hook for the reader in the introduction of Tied Together, but the “space camp” theory feels a bit forced. The critic wants to make a special connection with the lead character Ender, but the actual performance of Asa Butterfield is never addressed in the review. As a result, Arbeiter’s story of youth feels disconnected and appears to come from space.

The biggest disappointment of Tied Together is Arbeiter’s failure to expand on the intricacies of the plot. He makes it clear that Ender goes through the pains of adolescence just like the average Joe, but never quite explains what exactly is happening in space and who is with him.

Tied Together is incredibly vague except when it comes to the ending. Arbeiter references “loud-mouth” friends who ruin “the big reveal”, but doesn’t seem to understand that making blatant references to the ending makes him guilty by association. The critic manages to offer the audience little about the actual plot, but certainly wants you to know that something big happens at the end.

Michael Arbeiter produces little character analysis in Tied Together, which makes the emo-review more annoying than helpful.    

Quality of Writing Quality of Argument Spoiler Avoidance Presentation