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Joe Neumaier Might Have Only Seen Trailer in “Furnace Movie”

In response to Joe Neumaier’s 428‑word review of Out of the Furnace on New York Daily News

By ,

Oh, wow. It this real? The latest pseudo-review from Joe Neumaier, “Out of the Furnace: Movie review,” is plot summary that includes a few original thoughts from the critic to let his audience know that he most likely saw the film.

The review connoisseur will surely become distraught due to a typo in the latter half of Furnace Movie, and the abrupt ending only makes it worse. One may search for a stiff drink and take a long walk outside just to mentally cleanse themselves.

Neumaier shows a lack of review game in Furnace Movie by jumping into plot summary after noting the film is about “day-to-day struggle.” There is no argument to be found or anything that might lead one to believe that Neumaier has seen more than the trailer.

Furnace Movie is loaded with visuals, which is a plus, but they may have been inserted by Mr. Neumaier solely to make up for the horrific nature of the review. “Oh wow, look at those images! I think I love this review?” says the reader. Strong images can have a hypnotic quality, and the critic appears to have gone with the “four image fananagle,” which is all the rage for weak reviews.

The latter half of Furnace Movie informs one that “mountains loom in the background,” and also that actors are in the film. Character analysis is definitely not a strong point for Neumaier, however he at least gives a tiny bit of effort by noting that Casey Affleck is “heartbreakingly feral.”

Furnace Movie is truly a tough review to get through.    

Quality of Writing Quality of Argument Spoiler Avoidance Presentation