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Chris Bumbray’s “Review: Escape Plan” Can’t Take Off

In response to Chris Bumbray’s 624‑word review of Escape Plan on JoBlo's Movie Emporium

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While a review site called JoBlo isn’t exactly catering to Noam Chomsky intellectuals, Chris Bumbray’s writing in “Review: Escape Plan” doesn’t muster enough to garner sympathy, and his prose will leave many feeling like making a break for it.

Bursting at the seams with run-on sentences, hackneyed clichés, warmed-over platitudes, and clumsy, ill-conceived phrases, Review: Escape Plan is an uninspired piece of film journalism that would make any English teacher go home and rethink her life.

In the midst of all the gangliness, though, Bumbray does do some opining. He lauds the film for being a “fun-filled throwback to the type of movie that made the both of them superstars” and praises Arnold Schwarzenegger, who “hasn’t been this much fun since True Lies.”

In crafting their artistry, critics need strong, well-argued opinions, so wordings like “pretty much” and incorporating the passive voice do little to inspire confidence that there’s any real contemplation going on behind the scenes.

In all fairness, Bumbray may well be aware that his audience is looking for exactly this type of Bro-this-movie-is-AWESOME style (a theory born out by a short perusal of the comments section.) If that’s you, by all means, go for it dude, but if you are looking for something a little higher on the food chain, fly this coop now.    

Quality of Writing Quality of Argument Spoiler Avoidance Presentation